Thursday is Bring Your Barbarian to Work Day

"Conan, what is best in life?"

"Um...wait...wait...I know this one...to crush your enemies, to drive them before you, and to hear the lamentations of the w..."

"Stop. Yes, Conan, what you are saying would usually be right. But not now. Not at this time of year."

"'Time of year'? You mean, winter?"

"No, Conan. Look behind you."

"At what? The deer? You mean hunting season? That is a good time of year. Venison jerky is pretty tasty, although that boy deer...his nose looks kind of, I dunno, infected..."

"No, Conan. Behind you."

"Wait...you mean the Yeti? Man, killing Yetis is totally bitchin'...I remember this one time, Red Sonja and I were up in the mountains playing 'Hide the Sword,' and..."

"Stop! I do not have enough brain bleach to get that image out of my head."

"Sorry."

"Now, turn around, Conan. Look at what's right behind you."

"Um...a tree?"

"Right. What kind of tree?"

"Uh...an evergreen?"

*facepalm*

"Er...is chopping wood what's best in life? Well, I do have this honkin' axe, and I love having wood..."

"What did I just tell you about the brain bleach, Conan?"

"Sorry."

"Now, the tree...Conan, it's a Christmas tree."

"A what now?"

"A Christmas tree, dumbass."

"Hey, watch the "dumbass" talk, mister. I do have an axe, y'know. And a sword."

"Sorry. But...Christmas tree? Y'know...Christmas? The birthday of Jesus Christ?"

"Dude, I pray to Crom...sometimes...when it looks like I'm gonna, y'know, die and stuff..."

"Yeah, but does Crom have a whole birthday thing, with presents and shiny paper and eggnog?"

"Not so much, no."

"Well then...Conan, what is best in life?"

"Uh...Christmas?"

"Good answer."